


Three Types of Schmucks

by pyrrhical (anoyo)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, coarse language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-23
Updated: 2013-11-23
Packaged: 2018-10-21 08:32:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10681590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anoyo/pseuds/pyrrhical
Summary: Whenever Dean fights a monster, kills a monster, whatever, he invariably meets some poor schmuck who’s been pulled from the la-la-land of “Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark” and into “Be Afraid of the Dark, It’ll Fucking Eat Your Face.”





	Three Types of Schmucks

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted [here](http://fic-promptly.dreamwidth.org/211280.html?thread=8854096#cmt8854096).
> 
> Once an anthology, but I hated it, so reposted alone.

Whenever Dean fights a monster, kills a monster, whatever, he invariably meets some poor schmuck who’s been pulled from the la-la-land of “Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark” and into “Be Afraid of the Dark, It’ll Fucking Eat Your Face.” Now, over the years, he’s separated these schmucks into three categories: the schmucks who’ll stick their heads back into the sand as soon as his taillights are out of sight, the schmucks who’ll remember but do nothing about it (except randomly call Dean when something inexplicable happens, because apparently he’s Monster OnStar), and the schmucks who join the fight.

Out of the three, Dean has a strange amount of respect for the schmucks who join the fight. Somehow, he feels a little bit responsible – which is crazy, since, you know, he had nothing to do with the monster of the week choosing to chomp on their neighbor/husband/kitten – and so he takes it upon himself to offer a little bit of advice.

He answers phone calls, talks about what-to-do-if, and, basically, provides the new and untested with their very own Bobby. But he’s pretty sure that the best advice he’s ever given, and that he ever will give, he’s given to every single one of them.

It’s that, in order to do this job, you have to get past the fact that your new day job is killing monsters. Eventually, it’ll stop being weird. For Dean, it stopped being weird before he hit puberty, but he’s learned that there’s a bit of an adjustment curve based on how old you are when you start. The point is: once you get the fuck over it, you can move on to whether or not the fact that your day job occasionally saves the entire goddamn world will ever stop being weird.

Yeah, he’s pretty sure that’s just something that never happens.


End file.
